Friday, April 21, 2006
England Fans Start Praying
because if this is true then this World Cup may be the only chance we have of winning anything for a very very very long time....
Party
So tonight it's my birthday party which I am looking forward to immensely. It's fancy dress as well so stay tuned (if that's an applicable phrase for checking blogs?) on Monday and I'll put up some highly embarrasing photos of the wife and yours truly.
I saw Daniel Kitson at the Melbourne International Comedy Festival last night and very funny he was too. His rants against 'smokers rights' and Zoo magazine were highlights and in some places he hit comedy nirvana particuarly when he described someone as 'cunt cubed'. Exceptionally funny.
However, the whole premise of his narrative was that stuff that is 'alternative' gets shit as soon as it hits the mainstream and that success inevitably means that fuckwits will start to like it and therefore the appeal of it (whether it be a band, song, movie etc) becomes diminished.
Now, this is a perspective I have always had issue with.
I like ATB '9pm Till I Come' - the slightly cheesy tune that really launched the trance explosion in 1999. Now, this tune was loved by every Sharon and Tracey in the land, in Ritzy nightclubs from Aberdeen to Aylesbury but you know what, I still liked it and still like it to this day. The actual tune hasn't changed no matter how many Barrys in their Ben Sherman tops have oi oi'ed to it down Chasers. It's the same song. If you like the song for what it is then your love for it shouldn't have changed. If however, you liked it because at first it was a new 'in' thing and only known by a few people 'in the know' then I would say your love of that song was extremely shallow. Similarly, if a band you like gets big and they start playing to 5,000 people rather than 100 people then surely you should be happy for them that their success is reaping rewards? And yes, some of the 'great unwashed' may come along and see them but hey ignore them and concentrate on the reason you're meant to be there: the music.
The problem with a lot of well educated middle class people is that they really hate it when the working classes start to invade their turf. Whether it be in a cultural sense or an educational sense. For example, it's all very well for Tarquin to study Philosophy & Latin at Cambridge but dear god, look at those oiks studying Media Studies at Kingston University - surely they should be doing something worthwhile with their lives like carpentery or plumbing?
The argument Kitson and many of his ilk make is nothing but smug snoberry - he may be funny, but he's wrong.
However, the whole premise of his narrative was that stuff that is 'alternative' gets shit as soon as it hits the mainstream and that success inevitably means that fuckwits will start to like it and therefore the appeal of it (whether it be a band, song, movie etc) becomes diminished.
Now, this is a perspective I have always had issue with.
I like ATB '9pm Till I Come' - the slightly cheesy tune that really launched the trance explosion in 1999. Now, this tune was loved by every Sharon and Tracey in the land, in Ritzy nightclubs from Aberdeen to Aylesbury but you know what, I still liked it and still like it to this day. The actual tune hasn't changed no matter how many Barrys in their Ben Sherman tops have oi oi'ed to it down Chasers. It's the same song. If you like the song for what it is then your love for it shouldn't have changed. If however, you liked it because at first it was a new 'in' thing and only known by a few people 'in the know' then I would say your love of that song was extremely shallow. Similarly, if a band you like gets big and they start playing to 5,000 people rather than 100 people then surely you should be happy for them that their success is reaping rewards? And yes, some of the 'great unwashed' may come along and see them but hey ignore them and concentrate on the reason you're meant to be there: the music.
The problem with a lot of well educated middle class people is that they really hate it when the working classes start to invade their turf. Whether it be in a cultural sense or an educational sense. For example, it's all very well for Tarquin to study Philosophy & Latin at Cambridge but dear god, look at those oiks studying Media Studies at Kingston University - surely they should be doing something worthwhile with their lives like carpentery or plumbing?
The argument Kitson and many of his ilk make is nothing but smug snoberry - he may be funny, but he's wrong.
Women + World Cup = Bad
I like this:
World Cup Rules for Women
World Cup Rules for Women
LIST OF RULES
1. From 9 June to 9 July 2006, you should read the sports section of the newspaper so that you are aware of what is going on regarding the World Cup, and that way you will be able to join in the conversations. If you fail to do this, then you will be looked at in a bad way, or you will be totally ignored. DO NOT complain about not receiving any attention.
2. During the World Cup, the television is mine, at all times, without any exceptions. If you even take a glimpse of the remote control, you will lose it (your eye).
3. If you have to pass by in front of the TV during a game, I don't mind, as long as you do it crawling on the floor and without distracting me. If you decide to stand nude in front of the TV, make sure you put clothes on right after because if you catch a cold, I wont have time to take you to the doctor or look after you during the World Cup month.
4. During the games I will be blind, deaf and mute, unless I require a refill of my drink or something to eat. You are out of your mind if you expect me to listen to you, open the door, answer the telephone, or pick up the baby that just fell from the second floor....it wont happen.
5. It would be a good idea for you to keep at least 2 six packs in the fridge at all times, as well as plenty of things to nibble on, and please do not make any funny faces to my friends when they come over to watch the games. In return, you will be allowed to use the TV between 12am and 6am, unless they replay a good game that I missed during the day.
6. Please, please, please!! if you see me upset because one of my teams is losing, DO NOT say "get over it, its only a game", or "don't worry, they'll win next time". If you say these things, you will only make me angrier and I will love you less. Remember, you will never ever know more about football than me and your so called "words of encouragement" will only lead to a break up or divorce.
7. You are welcome to sit with me to watch one game and you can talk to me during halftime but only when the commercials are on, and only if the halftime score is pleasing me. In addition, please note I am saying "one" game, hence do not use the World Cup as a nice cheesy excuse to "spend time together".
8. The replays of the goals are very important. I don't care if I have seen them or I haven't seen them, I want to see them again. Many times.
9. Tell your friends NOT to have any babies, or any other child related parties or gatherings that requires my attendance because:
a) I will not go,
b) I will not go, and
c) I will not go.
10. But, if a friend of mine invites us to his house on a Sunday to watch a game, we will be there in a flash.
11. The daily World Cup highlights show on TV every night is just as important as the games themselves. Do not even think about saying "but you have already seen this...why don't you change the channel to something we can all watch??", the reply will be: "Refer to Rule #2 of this list".
12. And finally, please save your expressions such as "Thank God the World Cup is only every 4 years". I am immune to these words, because after this comes the Champions League, Italian League, Spanish League, Premier League, etc etc.
Thank you for your cooperation.
Regards,
Men of the World
1. From 9 June to 9 July 2006, you should read the sports section of the newspaper so that you are aware of what is going on regarding the World Cup, and that way you will be able to join in the conversations. If you fail to do this, then you will be looked at in a bad way, or you will be totally ignored. DO NOT complain about not receiving any attention.
2. During the World Cup, the television is mine, at all times, without any exceptions. If you even take a glimpse of the remote control, you will lose it (your eye).
3. If you have to pass by in front of the TV during a game, I don't mind, as long as you do it crawling on the floor and without distracting me. If you decide to stand nude in front of the TV, make sure you put clothes on right after because if you catch a cold, I wont have time to take you to the doctor or look after you during the World Cup month.
4. During the games I will be blind, deaf and mute, unless I require a refill of my drink or something to eat. You are out of your mind if you expect me to listen to you, open the door, answer the telephone, or pick up the baby that just fell from the second floor....it wont happen.
5. It would be a good idea for you to keep at least 2 six packs in the fridge at all times, as well as plenty of things to nibble on, and please do not make any funny faces to my friends when they come over to watch the games. In return, you will be allowed to use the TV between 12am and 6am, unless they replay a good game that I missed during the day.
6. Please, please, please!! if you see me upset because one of my teams is losing, DO NOT say "get over it, its only a game", or "don't worry, they'll win next time". If you say these things, you will only make me angrier and I will love you less. Remember, you will never ever know more about football than me and your so called "words of encouragement" will only lead to a break up or divorce.
7. You are welcome to sit with me to watch one game and you can talk to me during halftime but only when the commercials are on, and only if the halftime score is pleasing me. In addition, please note I am saying "one" game, hence do not use the World Cup as a nice cheesy excuse to "spend time together".
8. The replays of the goals are very important. I don't care if I have seen them or I haven't seen them, I want to see them again. Many times.
9. Tell your friends NOT to have any babies, or any other child related parties or gatherings that requires my attendance because:
a) I will not go,
b) I will not go, and
c) I will not go.
10. But, if a friend of mine invites us to his house on a Sunday to watch a game, we will be there in a flash.
11. The daily World Cup highlights show on TV every night is just as important as the games themselves. Do not even think about saying "but you have already seen this...why don't you change the channel to something we can all watch??", the reply will be: "Refer to Rule #2 of this list".
12. And finally, please save your expressions such as "Thank God the World Cup is only every 4 years". I am immune to these words, because after this comes the Champions League, Italian League, Spanish League, Premier League, etc etc.
Thank you for your cooperation.
Regards,
Men of the World
Bush Lies - Wow what a surprise!
The depressing thing about this is that most people in their heart of hearts knew before the 2004 election that Bush lied about Iraq but he was still elected with an increased number of votes. The reason that Bush got relected was due to the awesome Republican strategy department and the fact that John Kerry was simply not a credible, inspiring candidate and his party had no coherent message. The same is true of the Tory Party in the UK and the Labor Party in Australia - this is why the leaders of the 'coalition of the willing' have not been punished - there has been no credible alternative and that is a tragedy for Western democracy.
Mind you, I still backed Labour in the last UK election, Blair may have fucked up over Iraq but I'd rather grin and bear that than let the Tories back in and start to ruin the improvements in domestic policy that have been achieved under Labour.
Mind you, I still backed Labour in the last UK election, Blair may have fucked up over Iraq but I'd rather grin and bear that than let the Tories back in and start to ruin the improvements in domestic policy that have been achieved under Labour.
Thursday, April 20, 2006
Driving, cycling, spots and double chins
Yay! Today, I passed my driving test today which I am very excited about as you can imagine. My test went very well with even my reverse parking going perfectly. I had 5 bad marks out of 53 so scored above 90%
It's taken me a long time to get it (I'm 28 today) but I'm now pleased I can drive to the shops to pick up bread, milk and the papers on the weekend thus completely satisfying my 'no exercise on weekends' policy (bar dancing of course!)
The only irritating thing was that I had a massive spot on my cheek which I was not impressed with at all. At least it makes me look like I got my license when I was a spotty teenager though eh? Saves the embarrassment that I often have in Australia when I tell people I have been learning to drive – not being able to drive by 18 in Australia is like not taking drugs by the age of 18 in the UK : unthinkable.
I also noticed a bit of a double chin action as well going on – arrrgggh middle spread is upon me. Although I do intend to step up my efforts at the gym. Last night the wife and I went to spinning which I quite enjoyed, I think it brings out the masochist in you as being shouted at by some fitness Nazi is not usually most people’s idea of pleasure. Why oh why do they always have such shocking taste in music? I’ve heard it all in spinning classes: euro pop versions of California Dreaming, DJ Sammy, The Corrs and last night we were ‘treated’ to Scooter. Nice. Possibly the worst tune I’ve ever heard in my life but it certainly encouraged you to ‘push to the end’ as you convinced yourself that the faster you pedaled the quicker the song would finish. Alas it didn’t. Fitness Nazi even kept it playing to the end of it’s 32 bar outro. Bitch.
(and for those of who don't know, here is what spinning looks like:)
Wednesday, April 19, 2006
One of the most bizzare party political ads I've ever seen. Although it may be amusing to us die hard Labourites, will the electorate really like it? I have my doubts.
Yes, I know. No posts for 5 days. Bad me.
Well I would have posted more today and yesterday if it wasn't for my bloody IT system at work going into meltdown at 11am yesterday. I accidently unplugged my modem and BAM! the whole mini network collapsed. So I spent the entirity of yesterday trying to get it back up and running but to no avail, after hours spent this morning we now have limited connectivity. Bizzare to say the least...It has meant that the spare time I have had outside of trying to fix it I have actually had to fill with work which has meant no time for the blog.
And to think of all the things I could have ranted about: Howard's new Asylum policy, Katie Holmes giving birth, USA V Iran and I could have talked at length about just how undeserved the Ice Age's success is. But they are all now rants under the bridge, swept away by time. Hopefully, there will be something worth talking about tomorrow...
Well I would have posted more today and yesterday if it wasn't for my bloody IT system at work going into meltdown at 11am yesterday. I accidently unplugged my modem and BAM! the whole mini network collapsed. So I spent the entirity of yesterday trying to get it back up and running but to no avail, after hours spent this morning we now have limited connectivity. Bizzare to say the least...It has meant that the spare time I have had outside of trying to fix it I have actually had to fill with work which has meant no time for the blog.
And to think of all the things I could have ranted about: Howard's new Asylum policy, Katie Holmes giving birth, USA V Iran and I could have talked at length about just how undeserved the Ice Age's success is. But they are all now rants under the bridge, swept away by time. Hopefully, there will be something worth talking about tomorrow...
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
